Sometimes five means two

Just back from spending the Thanksgiving holiday in Maui. *sigh* I always think I know what to expect from Maui: sun, beach, pool, recharge. But, it always catches me by surprise, because it always exceeds my expectations. Well, not the food this time, but everything else that is great about Maui. Sadly, I had very high expectations for my dining experiences, because we were pimpin' our vacay five stars. The food we were served barely eked out two stars. The ahi was not fresh. Ahi not fresh! How can that be? I was sitting at a table that overlooks a gigantic ocean full of fish, and I was served ahi that was so old I smelled the distinguishable odor before I even raised fork to mouth. I begrudgingly gave the resort a pass on the fish, since it was beachside dining. I made excuses for the cook: 1. He spent the morning surfing, but bit it on a huge swell and couldn't get the salt out of his nose; thus, smelling salt above and beyond all aromas; 2. He had a mandatory mai tai tasting before his shift, leaving him incapable of logical decision making, including how to actually sear "seared ahi"; or 3. He was a secret agent. He wasn't actually a cook, but merely played one to sabotage the five star competition; thereby increasing the favorability of his nearby four star resort (starts with a W). So, I set my sights on the next day's Thanksgiving feast. Well, feast it was not; and post dinner was more like, do we have any pretzels left from the flight? I can't even describe the meal, because three hundred dollars later, I'm still shaking my head about it. Robbery? Quite like it; but, not intentional, I'm sure. The staff was so pleasant I feel a bit of guilt dishing their food; but, still. It was bad.

At any rate, we did discover a decent restaurant where I experienced, quite possibly, the best seared scallops of all time. They were wrapped in bacon, which I usually don't eat (it bothers me that pigs don't sweat, but I do appreciate the added value of pork fat), which gave them a deep smokey salty (but not too salty) note that was balanced by the interior of the scallop that was what I can only describe as creamy sweetness, light and dense at the same time. It's the sort of lusciousness you either can't eat fast enough or you move at a snail's pace through the dish, savoring each bite and then regretting that there is one less bite left. The scallop was so pure, it was as if it had rocketed itself from the sea onto my plate. It was really fresh. Then it ocurred to me that it's possible I had never had a fresh scallop (contrary to the point of sale shpeal from the Pike Place Market fish mongers). So, apologies for the lame photo; but, as soon as I snapped a shot of the scallops, the general manager swiftly appeared at our table looking displeased and asked if everything was to my liking. I read that as "stop taking pictures of our food." At any rate, Maui was beautiful and injected me with so much rejuvenation (Mahalo Maui) that I promptly whipped up an entire belated Thanksgiving dinner upon arriving back in good old rainy Seattle.